Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Hold Me Back, Mamas

This morning I was at the perinatologist's office for my weekly ultrasound (everything is good, BTW!). It was super busy and crowded, with lots of women in all stages of pregnancy. I was sitting near the front of the office, so I could overhear some of the conversations as women came to check in. No, I wasn't eavesdropping! But Fit Pregnancy magazine can only provide so much distraction... especially for this mama : ) So one woman dropped off her forms (it was obviously her first time there) and the admin started flipping through them. I guess she noticed the "Baby's Father" section wasn't filled out, so the admin inquired if she had skipped that part accidentally. The woman laughed awkwardly and said, "No. I just haven't had any discussions with my husband about it yet, so I don't want to put him down on the form. I know what his reaction will be...". Hmmmmm... I thought it was strange, but went on reading about daily exercise routines while pregnant - nice.

So about 30 minutes later, I see the woman run out into the hall pale as a ghost, and then a few seconds later follow her Shrek-like husband into the waiting room. He threw himself into a chair and started huffing and puffing. And ladies - this was the icing on the cake - he was wearing white athletic ankle socks with black loafers and dress pants. Umm - seriously?! Then, as if no one else was in the room, the man says, "It is RIDICULOUS that you are pregnant again. How could you let this happen? I told you we were DONE with kids!" All the other pregos in the room looked at each other with wide eyes. Was this guy serious? Had she cheated on him or something? Ohhhhh no. He went on to say this next statement to prove he was truly an idiot - "It's your responsibility to make sure this doesn't happen. You tricked me." WHAT?! The woman had all she could do to keep from crying (she was also reading a copy of Fit Pregnancy - and we know nothing in there is enough to bring you to tears!).

At this point all the other pregos were staring the man down, shaking our heads with disgust, and trying to hold our tongues. If there is one group of people in the world you don't want to mess with, it's the mamas!!

So then he pulls out his laptop computer and begins ferociously typing with his sausage fingers. He must have pulled up some sort of vacation website because the next thing you know he taps his wife's arm, turns the monitor towards her, and says, "Wow. This looks beautiful. But we can't go there because you've gone and gotten pregnant!" And then snaps the screen away from her. It was obvious this was the last straw for one mama who was at the water dispenser... she turned around, looked straight at him and said, "Excuse me, but let me tell you something, sir. I have been listening to your rude remarks for the past 15 minutes - the way you have been berating your wife - and let me tell you this: it takes two to tango, so SHUT THE HELL UP!" Then she goes to walk away, but turns back and says to the wife, "And bless your heart sweetheart. Lord only knows how you put up with him."

HALLELUIA! The man turned red and huffed back into the hall, loafers, white ankle socks and all. His wife followed him into the hall. And then I got called for my appointment. It made me thankful for my loving husband - even if he does snore like a freight train. : )